Where is Taylor Swift’s new song ‘Florida!!!’ really taking us?

From the first line in her new song “Florida!!!,” you can already tell that Taylor Swift has heard our state’s unofficial motto: A sunny place for shady people.

“You can beat the heat if you beat the charges too,” she sings. “They said I was a cheat, I guess it must be true.”

In “Florida!!!,” Swift paints a portrait of an alluring state built on contradictions, incorporating both the beautiful and the brutal. She leans into the weirdness of our crime and lore. A lot of people have something to say about Florida’s reputation. If anyone gets that, it’s Swift.

The theories about the song began in February, as soon as the singer released the track list for her 11th studio album, “The Tortured Poets Department.” Will she sing about her three-night run in Tampa, her only Florida tour dates on the first leg of the Eras Tour? Those were the first concerts following the tabloids picking up on her breakup with Joe Alwyn, her boyfriend of six years. Gossip accounts speculated that he cheated on her in Orlando.

Would she mention her father, who has a place in Pinellas County? Or might she go even further back — to the time she played as a teen at the old St. Pete Pier and at the Florida Strawberry Festival?

Swift foreshadowed her journey down south in the first track on the album, “Fortnight,” singing with Post Malone: “Move to Florida, buy the car you want.” When we actually get to “Florida!!!,” the eighth song, it’s clear Swift needs a break. “Florida!!!” is a dazzling respite. By then, the pop star has already contemplated the loss of Alwyn in “So Long, London.”

Bucking expectations, more of the album seems to be about Swift’s fling last summer with Matty Healy, singer of the English indie rock band The 1975. She heads, as people often do when they’re running away from something, to the Sunshine State.

Little did you know your home’s really only a town you’re just a guest in

So you work your life away just to pay for a timeshare down in Destin

Panhandle representation! Then the chorus smashes in, bright and disorienting as stumbling outside into the afternoon sun.

Florida, is one hell of a drug / Florida, can I use you?

I need to forget, so take me to Florida / I’ve got some regrets, I’ll bury them in Florida

Florence Welch, of Florence + the Machine, delivers the haunting second verse. Her voice is deep and chilling as the scene unfolds.

The hurricane was my name when it came

I got drunk and I dared it to wash me away

Barricaded in the bathroom with a bottle of wine

There was actually a hurricane named Florence that formed on Aug. 31, 2018 — the first major hurricane of the 2018 Atlantic storm season. It killed 2 people in Florida before devastating the Carolinas, where 49 others perished. The World Meteorological Organization has since retired the name.

If you’re wondering, Taylor has never appeared on the storm list for the Atlantic basin, and won’t anytime soon: The names for the next six years are Tony, Tanya, Teddy, Teresa, Tobias and Tammy. These will rotate unless a storm is catastrophic enough for a name to be retired.

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Welch continues, leaning into the stereotypical image of the state as a hotbed of crime with poetic flair:

All my girls got their lace and their crimes and your cheating husband disappeared / Well, no one asks any questions here.

So I did my best, to lay to rest / All of the bodies that have ever been on my body and in my mind

They sink into the swamp / Is that a bad thing to say in a song?

In a world of over-the-top Florida Man headlines, the song is another caricature, albeit a fun one. Swift and Welch sell this scandalous escape with a wink. Like sand sticking to you after the beach, this one will linger for a while.

What a crash, what a rush

F--k me up, Florida